Groucho Marx Quotes

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Groucho Marx



A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

Groucho Marx



A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

Groucho Marx



A man's only as old as the woman he feels.

Groucho Marx



A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.

Groucho Marx



Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.

Groucho Marx



All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.

Groucho Marx



Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Groucho Marx